the topography of missing

somedays
a salt flat
white as a blank page
flat - wide open primal plain
dusty & surreal
with a dome of vast blue
horizon to horizon
marked
by chem trails & echoes & thorny things
my presence a shadow
upon time
somedays
a lush prairie rolling
smelling of summer golden
somedays
the stone that lies in a river
polished & weary
somedays
nothing extraordinary
becoming ordinary when pressed between the layers
of you 

of May ...

Baltimore Orioles visit the hackberry tree now

surprising the shadows
with its vermillion joy
stealing purple from the sky
sometimes the wind blows the branches so
tumultuously that the world shimmers green
a thousand shades verdant & conscious
seeking the sun 

before

there was once
everything
tucked between blades of grass
small worlds teeming
the smell of the cosmos brought to bone
riding on one inhale
lodging behind your heart
the sun
warming the day that lies before you like cherry kool-aid
no damping the
everything
with
shame
shame comes later on long legs & captured birds
regret tastes of open roads & momentary forgetfulness
a summer promise of daisy-chains & blue

now
we dig deep below the soil--below the skin
to tap the current of knowing
we should have gone there years ago
tapped the root of truth below the surface
ate of the fruit with relish & owning

shame has two sides

blades of grass hold the whispered secrets
come ~ lie with me here and taste the madness of this world

this day
before it is too late

redemption

I dreamt the contrast
of light against the shallow
containers of life pressed and chalked to buildings shadowed
tightness and expansion folded into the transparency of being
I am a jellyfish
both enchanted by myself & repulsed
changing to fit into the mold provided by my captors
freedom carried in an overnight bag
smelling of yesterday & you
dust lies thick as fear
yet
generosity steeps in lavender tea left to capture the last rays of a sun
too oft forgotten
power lies in the open fields beyond the stars
beyond this dust

spring fever

somnolent and sullen I've been
awaiting my elixir
perfectly portioned to numb the limbs of trees
and wings of songbirds
the ancient doorknob falls apart in my hands as I enter
the space between here and there
gold to grain
gathering milkweed and goldenrod from the river's edge
while the world burned
turn down the bed
turn up the volume of Dylan and The Band
sit here with me and watch the shadows become

sit here with me
still and poised upon the hands of every-time
too trite
too right
the breeze off the water wakens

chills the
bones and the wings of songbirds
changing transforming aging
creating still
breathing still
do you smell the smoldering of Spring?
do you hear the rush of the weary?
after the cooling
where will we rest?
amongst the cottonwood and warrens of rabbits and fox
tall grasses dance
and become

it is what it is

there is a trembling to my sternum
cacophonous and startling
like a bird trapped
against the wire
there is the sky but I can not touch it
feathers singing to a moon tucked upon the cusp of highway
sun lies
love dies
there is no warmth
merely a shadowing of clouds to the density of winter
trembling trembling
I feel you there brushing against my shoulder like a ghost
there is a depth
terrifying--tight
narrowing to spring's promise
delight hides from eyes accustomed to the dark
there is a trembling to my days
cacophonous and startling
in their hollow
like a bird trapped
there ....

epoch

a blueprint?
or a veil to your days
as
you are to mine--
do you listen to Radiohead wailing to the new moon
or do you sip tea amongst colleagues draped in sanity
pretending wholeness?
are you filled with whiskey or love
here in these dark times
pressing pressing
against the bark of trees to hear their prayer?
tell me ...
is there measure & merit
cheer & choirs of dormant bees
how far do you see without me?
are horizons wide and outlined in violet-blue?
are winds fierce and smelling of summer?
take the ink and trace the line of rivers to
the January moon and back again
pressing pressing
a blueprint or a veil?
perhaps
both ... as it once was it remains
arms open
to sky
and
stillness