Thursday, October 6, 2011

portrait











. . . still that girl in school who gets picked last
too tall & too skinny to be good or fast
 at anything
"she listens to led zeppelin & csn&y"
too much of a perfectionist to swing the bat
to take a shot
to discover a way to untie the indigo  knot
deep inside
perfection had to be instant
too blond & too weird
so much fear
knowing i had landed on the wrong fucking planet
cat stevens, heart & james taylor were my companions
all the while peering over the edge of souls canyon
playing at sex & seduction
 . . dressing up as a playboy bunny in pink lace & a fuzzy-white earmuff bra
i served kings & polar bears, little joe & yogi bear
i heard the silent desperation of the lost & terrified
wrapping my heart in thorns & glass armor
but it was there on my sleeve for all to see
silent,  everyone assumes apathy
& emptiness
ice coolness
but it is a feeling pounding & profound that trembles the earth  - paralyzing
tapped into something bigger, brighter, grand
is there ever a master plan ?
too much of everything
perfection becomes the mask, the game
and it's not about who gets picked at all
but who finally stands alone with pink lace, heart & a white earmuff bra

1 comment:

  1. A contrast between the outward personality which strives to fit in and be the best and the storms of confusion and anxiety that rage inside the mind. Well written.

    ReplyDelete