JSB

I should have known
as I did take note of the bold outline of each moment
stark--exact
the slender fragility of his body
the sharp tang of a hospital room
      its crisp sterility contrasted to night

we watched ER together

an episode titled 'Homecoming'
he really liked Dr. Greene

crawling next to him in the narrow bed
we lay pressed and still
the white waffle blanket was so stiff-starched
      its brightness such a contrast to the night

his legs were ice cold-so very cold
I love him so

still

that hole remains infinite
yet finite its missing

I don't remember driving room that night
but he died early the next morning
drinking coffee on the edge of his bed

just like that

      his love such a contrast to the hollow loneliness that shadows my days